| henrts |
Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Please somebody help me.
I have two boys ages 12 and 15.
I've already told my mother and others that I have been a meth
addict for 16 yrs. I have not told my boys though. They think
that I drink or smoke pot. It rips me up inside to think how
they are going to react to the fact that their mother is a user
of the big "M" (meth). any help out there? |
| Replies... |
| TxTigger |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
You need to
tell them the truth. Because if you lie to them and they find
out that can be a lot worse. Trust me. I know. It is always
better to tell them truth than to ever lie. My kids which are 5
& 6 know I did "bad pills" which they now know is drugs. I want
them to know I have always told them the truth even in the
beginning.
|
| lax2 |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Can I assume
that you are clean now ? If so, for how long ?
If not...well... are you working on a plan to get clean or stop
using?
|
| TnSkye |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
I had my
husband tell our daughter the truth when she was 9. Maybe your
truth will help keep them or some of their friends from ever
trying it.
|
| roadwife |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
It's a hard
question.
But my kids found out on their own, my 16 yr old found out on
the school bus from another kid that their dad did. Not a good
way to find out. My 14 yr old found out from her then. My 12 yr
old thought dad just drinks too much whiskey until this past
weekend, I finally told him. I thought I could protect them from
it. Not a good way. Don't expect too much from them, if and when
you do tell them. Remember they are kids. Anger seems to come
out first but give them time. It's hard on them and they are
wiser than most of us adults give them credit for.
I only wish you the best. And I agree, are you going for help?
Again I wish you only the best.
|
| roadwife |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
I had to come
back and correct myself. I said anger first. No one knows for
sure how kids are going to react. That was just my kids. That
was my kids and consider they found out the wrong way. Just
remember lying won't help them understand and it won't help you
either. |
| imlostinky |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Have answers
ready for their questions.
Have your recovery plan in place.
Yes you need to tell them, they will find out one way or the
other -it is best it come from you.
It would be best if when you told them, you could also say I am
doing this ,this , and this to help quit and be the mom I know I
can be.
They aren't grown no matter how much they like to think they
are.And how you handle it will make the difference.
If you go to them shaky and out of fear, they also will be
afraid.
If you go to them in control and standing on solid ground, then
they will be calmed.
We are only as sick as our secrets. Honesty will set you free-
being honest with yourself and those around you.
It won't be easy but you can beat this.
There is life after meth, we do recover- and we are good parents
after meth.
|
| Loraura |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
After you
have told them, make absolutely positive that you do not bring
meth into the house, into your car, into your purse or bags,
into any place that they could find it.
The curiosity to know "what the deal is with this drug mom is
on" could be enough for them to try it if they found it, and
look for it if they feel that they want to find answers
themselves.
Do your part to make sure they get their answers without finding
out first hand.
|
FreeOn
Kci |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
My 10 year
old and 11 year old knew mommy was doing something. They were
told by many people that it was meth and they thought the smell
was pot actually or some kind of drug. when they would ask what
I was doing I'd lie but then on Dec.20/2004 12 days after their
little sister was born the law came in with the welfare and
removed their sister from my arms and handed me a paper and told
my kids that their sister tested positive for meth when she was
born my kids called the law liars and said "my mommy don't do
meth ask her" GUESS what their mommy did...So to say the least
it is better to tell your kids ahead of time before they find
out otherwise hearing it from you will mean more to them as far
as honesty and trust goes. I spend everyday waking on gaining
their full trust back and by staying clean and in recovery they
love their mother and trust their mother again! Good luck
|
| henrts |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Thank you for
all the support. I have only been clean for 2 days now and this
is the first time in 16 years that I ever wanted to quit. I'm
tired of the lies, sleepless nights and fights. I look into my
boys eyes and want them to have so much more. I'm currently
going to NA but moving, so will start more intense
treatment once I arrive. I am scared that all these major
changes in my life is not the best time to try and stay sober.
But you have to start sometime.
|
FreeOn
Kci |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
You said "I
am scared that all these major changes in my life is not the
best time to try and stay sober" Well honey when you want to get
clean and stay clean the one thing you have to change is
EVERYTHING!!!!So now is a better time than any to start! You can
do this!!! No matter what changes you are going threw
NOTHING is worth getting high over!!!
|
| wildcat5 |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Kids are
really smart, if you don't tell them, they will find out then
you don't have their trust anymore...
|
| imlostinky |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Quote:
I am scared that all these major
changes in my life is not the best time to try and stay
sober.
Henrts, just do your best, work the program, and just take it
one day at a time.
Each morning Just for today I will not use. Just for today I
choose life.
That is all, just make it through this one day.
Don't worry about tomorrow, it isn't here. If you look too far
ahead, you will overwhelm yourself and give up before you begin.
Just for today I will reach out for help because I want to live,
I want to be the mother I know I can be.
Just one day at a time.
and know you are so not alone- we have been there, right where
you are, that is why we are here. To show you proof positive we
do recover and there is life after meth.
and we did it just this way, taking it one day at a time.
Just for today.
You can do this, I know you can even if you don't right now.
I have faith in you. Soon you will have faith of your own. |
| TinkM |
Re: Do I tell my kids I'm a meth addict?
Your first
priority is to get clean and sober. Alcohol is also a drug, pot
is illegal. If you are a meth addict you can not do any mind altering
substances. It is not going to help if you stop doing speed and
continue to do marijuana maintenance and/or drink. Until you get
clean and sober of all mind altering drugs, you will not be able
to be teachable to learn why you had to use to begin with. Drugs
are just a symptom of underlying problems, take them away and
the problems get even worse. I got clean and sober through the
12 steps , I had to do the footwork, and not pick up sometimes
one minute at at time. But its doable. First things first stop
using and get into recovery, since your drinking and smoking pot
you do not have to say anything but your going to stop both of
these and when you get to that part of your recovery, we call it
amends you can talk to you kids. Since your already abusing two
other drugs I would suggest you take care of you first and let
it happen when its time to address as I am sure there are more
things you have not told them.
If your kids know you drink and do pot I doubt they are going to
get to upset about the speed if they do not already know anyway.
Pot is illegal and your obviously not worried about what message
that sent, so go for it be honest. But be honest for the right
reasons, because you want them to know what you are doing is
wrong. along with drinking alcoholically and doing a illegal
drug. This is called being accountable as a parent and being
true to yourself.
The problem with most speed addicts is the day after remorse
when things are going badly. As soon however as they get a few
lumps in their sheet they are off and running again. You have to
have a reason to stop ...do you? If so then get into a program,
if its really bad go in house somewhere and get your life
together. The kids will leave soon and you will have to get
clean and sober for yourself or you will be out there again. |
